I’m sitting in the exactly same bus, like I did two years ago, when I was going to England.
I suddenly feel overwhelmed by the memories.
I had my head leaned against the window.
I felt every little shake of the bus.
And from shitty headphones, the Judas Priest’s Nostradamus rocking out.
And I’m getting to relive that memory.
Sweet, ain’t it?
xxx
I spent several hours now writing the short story for the contest I’m going to participate in (If I get to finish the story on time). I have honestly no idea what it’ll turn out to be. Maybe, that’s what I love about writing.
I am a very emotional person.
And I was pretty spooked to have found out that I get a sort of panic attacks sometimes.
Oh my, I do tend to get very hysteric once in a while.
But there's a good side to it; a great one really.
I have these moved moments, when I can really grasp the meaning of life.
In fact, I'm having one right now.
I just finished watching American Beauty.
Finally, I have decided to fill this major cultural blank of mine.
Or well, not that large actually - it ain't that well-known in Yurop.
That's right, yurop.
Art is to capture the unusual and paint it so it looks perfectly natural.
Feelings, in this case. All the characters in this film are incredibly frustrated. And yet, you never doubt what they do. You can only wonder what goes through their little heads.
A friend said, that a regular person wouldn't confess that they cried.
I can, however, without shame say that I did.
I don't know - confessing so sounds natural to me. Why shouldn't it be? Why would anyone be terrified to do so?
I have to, though, accuse myself of saying so only to prove something, or to attract attention.
But that's just the unconscious and un-self-conscious part of me.
Ignore it.
The soundtrack of that movie is great too - I think I'll get it and rip to samples. Oh yes, that's right, I am trying to learn to make electronic music. So I'll need plenty of good samples.
Entertaining - I just remembered the old movies with the cool guys and the ladies orderly forming a queue just to talk to them. Well, sounds like me in the muthafuckin' US of fuckin' A.
That's right, I'm going to USA.
For the next year's first semester.
So meet you in Atlanta!
It's Georgia on my Mind kids!
Sometimes I see younger me around me. Where it shouldn't be.
So passionate; yet they don't know what they're fighting for. I didn't either.
So willing; but they don't even know what are they supposed to do.
They know not what will be required. They think they can win.
They can't.
I couldn't.
You can either call it experience, or maturity.
But what it really is; is prioritizing.
Not so energetic, but way more effective.
Efficient.
Yes, you are right, it does take only like 5 minutes.
But then again, I gotta do 120 of 'em.
And that's not all - not by far.
Doesn't it just feel great, when someone says he'll have one last cigarette with you...to keep you from going away.
More so, if the guy's not a smoker.
And even more so, if you've met him for the first time tonight.
And even more even more so, if he's a doctor with a fuckin' beard.
And if you'll get unlimited supply of beer for the night for free...
I think I really started liking this whole "organising music events" business.
